Probably, my parents, they had somewhat unconventional lives and I guess that made me think I should too. Although, now it seems my decision of living as an unemployable narcissist isn’t so unconventional. I use figures, and representation in general, because it is the easiest way for me to visually communicate ideas of the human experience. But as the aspects of humanity I focus on and the opinions I have on them, those things change, I think it is natural to allow what and how I paint to also change.

Hopefully, the difference can be seen in the work. I was able to really begin to make the shifts in the technique that I have been wanting to make for a while. Painting is a long-term pursuit and I look forward to years from now when I can zoom out and see all the stages of change and improvements that are hard to notice day-to-day.

It’s been rough for many people well before 2020 and I would imagine these are the people feeling the most helpless now. It seems like none of the people we thought were working in our best interests have been doing anything but working to benefit themselves. But I think just as it was before this year, no one is going to come and give me anything for free that’s going to magically change my life overnight.
The only thing I can do is continue to work toward whatever goals I have and try my best not to go full apathy. You have to surround yourself with people who help you believe you can do what you’re trying to do. I never used to exercise. I would see runners and be so baffled as to why anyone would ever do that. During this year I have been able to make exercise a regular part of my life and I have to be cliché and say it really helps with the mind. Anxiety alleviation, confidence-boosting, all that shit. Or just do drugs. But seriously please be nice to each other. We need each other.

This is a problem anyone making figurative work has to reconcile and a question only non-white artists seem to have to answer. Apart from skin color, everything from clothing to the environment comes loaded with cultural and socioeconomic identifiers that can be alienating or exploitative.
What I want to talk about are the things we all share. I’ve met some dark mother fuckers in my life but no one is literally Black. Admittedly it has probably become too loaded of a color to use nowadays and adhering to it for so long has been contradictory to my claims of its irrelevance. But alas, they’re mostly blue in this show, hopefully better reiterating the intended universality of the figures.

I don’t know what role racial identity has beyond upholding tribalism. I understand the importance of groups and this concept of strength in numbers but I don’t think humanity’s biggest threats care what language you speak, who you pray to or what shade your skin is. As far as I can tell, all of these things are just assigned to you based on the lottery of where, when and who you were born to. There are problems with short-sightedness, greed and general sociopathy that have no racial boundaries. That being said, ideas about identity are currently flooding our system creating a lot of division while my dumbass is thinking about the military doing what it does and whether Food and Drugs commissioners being on the boards of pharmaceutical companies is a conflict of interest.

I want people, myself included, to develop a greater sense of accountability. I think there isa real agency in believing you are part of the problem because you can change yourself far easier than a stranger. As your behavior changes the world around will as well. For better or for worse.

The reality is I started painting in my bedroom at my mom’s house and I just couldn’t swing all the shenanigans of oil paint in there. The only advantage I can see is that it doesn’t stink and that it being water-soluble makes it easier to clean my brushes. I’ve made oil paintings in the past and I’ll make more in the future.

I have a better understanding of the medium than I did 5 years ago, and 5 years from now I will have a better understanding than today. I think the new paintings show more confidence, warranted or not. I used to obsess over hiding my hand even though in other people’s work I love seeing the marks as a historical record of every decision the painter made. I felt it just highlighted my insecurities and I am now trying to let people see more of my decision-making process because I think it is more interesting.

This also goes back to the idea of universality. I thought maybe by not making a portrait of anyone I would instead be making a portrait of everyone.

Yes, no doubt. The game is definitely about how much I can convey with the least amount of information.

I have a museum show next year. And I'm looking to utilize some different type of media.