The cover of Lola Young’s new album, I’m Only F**king Myself, shows somehow exactly that: the British singer-songwriter naked, hugging a powder-pink sex doll with… well, her own face. It’s a direct reference to the album’s title, but also to the part of Lola that made mistakes in the past. In the short film Track by Track, she talks about self-awareness and pain, about addiction, red sofas and voice notes — about each personal story hidden in the fourteen newly released songs.
“I’m grateful for you and grateful that I’m here and that I’m making art and I’m grateful that you know that there are cows, that the grass is still green,” Lola says to herself in that interview, while sitting on a white chair, in front of a white wall. And we hope so. I mean, there must be a reason why she’s wearing a top that says “Happiest girl in the world” in bright pink letters and cheesy flowers. But it hasn’t always been like that. In the past, the singer-songwriter, who grew up in Beckenham, southeast London, used sex, drugs –everything she “could get her hands on”– to heighten her emotions, to forget her own mistakes and to feel something.
And we already know –even learned to love– that vulnerable side of Lola, at least since she released the EP Messy in 2024. A huge success and a powerful statement we could all relate to, and one that finally led to her well-deserved international breakthrough. I don’t know about you guys, but I’m still blasting that banger into my ears every morning.
“And I’m too perfect till I open my big mouth, I want to be me, is that not allowed?” So true. “You hate it when I cry, unless it’s that time of the month.” Pfff. So, it makes perfect sense that her new album is also a journey through self-awareness and pain; how balance and acceptance can make you stronger, and, in a weird way, even happy.
“If I don’t get myself well, if I don’t quit what I really want to be doing –but not what I need to be doing– then I’m only fucking myself,” she summarises. And it sounds like she’s speaking from each of our souls. Relatable and honest. But even more important: once you take the ‘f**king’ out of her newest album title, you get I’m Only Myself — and somehow, in a very abstract way, that perfectly describes all you need to know about the record.
As the short film continues, Lola talks about her creative process, about Sad Sob Story, about Penny Out of Nothing. About how the track How Long Will It Take to Walk a Mile starts with a voice note from her friend Mandisa, who randomly asked that perfect question — meaning: how long will it take us to get where we want to be?
About how Spiders is one of her favourite songs on the LP, because it’s about blaming things on something else. On something that’s higher than you, something bigger, just so you don’t have to feel like you messed up. A kind of surrender to the mysterious power of destiny and the universe. Something we probably all want to do from time to time. Because Lola is right: admitting that you screwed up can be so much harder than just blaming God (lol).
I could go on now, telling you how Why Do I Feel Better When I Hurt You is Lola’s second favourite track, or how Not Like That Anymore tells the story of her time in New York after addiction, and how that track kind of ties the whole album together — but, stop. I think you should just watch the thirteen-minute-long short film yourself. Trust me, it’s going to be worth it. Because after that, you’ll love Lola even more than before.
And not only Lola. You’ll love the new album as well, of course. Because overall, I’m Only F**king Myself is a promising piece of raw, emotional pop: messy, honest, sometimes dark, but always deeply human. Just like Lola herself.
