What does it mean to hold hands with someone as you walk through the burning fire of life? In their collaborative 15-track album released this June, musicians Iceboy Violet and Nueen dive into the comfort, or sense of home a relationship can bring in the engulfing, scary depths on earth. The album, cleverly titled You Said You’d Hold My Hand Through The Fire, was created in three short months after Iceboy Violet endured a breakup of their long-term relationship.
After having met online and admiring one another’s music, Ice Boy Violet and Nueen connected over their shared appreciation for the venn diagram point of ambient music and rap. One song turned into a couple of songs, and now the pair have an album, which they recently performed at Sónar Barcelona.
The collection of tracks is a sort of goodbye to Ice Violet’s ex, an honest reflection of the fact that sometimes relationships end even if it offers love and positivity. In Ice Violet’s writing, accompanied by Nueen’s melancholic and nostalgic mixing tendencies, the musician doesn’t dwell on the gloom and disdain that can be felt during the culmination of a relationship, but also offers warm-hearted messages toward his ex. “This was one of the most important, loving relationships I’ve ever had and I want to document some of it,” Ice Boy Violet said in response to the meaning behind You Said You’d Hold My Hand Through The Fire.
Hi, how are each of you doing today?
Iceboy Violet: Hey, yeah I’m good, it’s grey in Berlin but in a cosy way. I’m slowly sinking my teeth into new projects, collaborations, obligations, and nibbling chocolate, it’s restful.
Nueen: All good, enjoying a few days off on the coast of Majorca, reading and doing some sport. Barcelona becomes a very hostile place in summer.
I’d love to know how each of you got into the music industry. Was this always something you guys wanted to do?
Iceboy Violet: Before I properly started making music and playing shows I wanted to work in games. I started making music when I was 18 because I needed to make something, I needed to end days with more than I started it with. Music was the only constant in my life. It still is. I grew up wanting to be a popstar, wanting to be in bands with my friends and tour. I couldn’t imagine anything more fun.
Nueen: Music has always been a passion of mine. My first encounter with it was in my teenage years when I started playing the drums. At 16, I began playing with friends in heavy metal and hardcore bands. Later on, I learned how to use Ableton and bought a Midi keyboard.
Your joint album, You Said You’d Hold My Hand Through The Fire, has been out for over a month now. How do you each view its success thus far?
Iceboy Violet: It’s always soft, a kind of being held feeling that comes with releasing stuff. We care about it and then put it out there, and when I see people making time for it, taking the time to listen to it and enjoy it, it always surprises me, pleasantly. Honestly, in a way it feels like it’s been out for years. It’s strange. I don’t know why. I just mostly feel grateful. Success in music feels hard to measure with numbers in any meaningful way. The people who reach out and tell me they love it, that’s the success of it.
Nueen: It has been a long project and we have put a lot of work into it together with the guys from Hyperdub, the designers, the photographer and so on. From what I've heard from people around me, the album has been very well received. So, I'm happy with the good feedback.
It’s one thing to collaborate on a song, but an entirely different thing to make an album together. So how did you guys meet, and when did you know you could complement each other so well?
Nueen: We met online. We both liked each other's music, so I think that made it easier for us to connect. We started sharing music and slowly developed the album, it was a very natural process.
Iceboy Violet: We met online, SoundCloud DMs I think. I listened to Nueen’s EP link and really loved it. It felt like a sibling project to my Drown to Float EPs, so I reached out and let him know. He got back to me and we talked about working on a song. One turned to a couple and then the break up happened, and it was kind of a right place, right time thing. I was just ready to let it all out. I think we have similar appreciations of both ambient music and rap and where the two overlap, in the auto tuned voices, in the lonely melancholy.
A press release regarding the album explains that the tracks highlight the course of a four-year relationship. I gathered from this information that it was your relationship, Ice? Is there any one aspect of that relationship that you wanted to get across in the making of the record?
Iceboy Violet: Yeah it was mine. The album was kind of a message to my ex, in a way, and as I wrote it, I just wanted to fill it with all these things I didn’t say to them in person, for one reason or another. I wanted to get across that it was full, it was important, it was seismic for me, that it reshaped what home means. I wanted to get across that the pain at the end didn’t overshadow the light it gave.
For you Nueen, what was the process like of creating alongside someone else’s emotions and relationship? Did you find ways to incorporate your own experience with love into this album?
Nueen: I knew Iceboy was going through a difficult time. We talked about it a lot, so I guess it affected me in a way, in terms of tones, harmonies etc. I always have a tendency to make melancholic and or nostalgic music, so I think that fits in very well with what they were going through.
Can you each describe other themes that are at play within the tracks?
Iceboy Violet: There’s a lot about buildings, home, walls. I love being at home. A relationship feels like a home with someone else, ideally. There’s other griefs, other relationships referred to on the album, memories and how they work, love and growth. But all the themes from my perspective were kind of secondary to me trying to get this message across I suppose. There wasn’t a whole lot of intentional construction in it. I just kept writing about how I felt.
I'm curious as to what each of your favourite songs are on the album and why?
Iceboy Violet: Fragmentary (Eraser) and Fawning - Interlude. Fawning because the sound of our laughter feels like, for me, a perfect kind of monument to our relationship. I considered naming the album My memories of us are of laughter. That song really gets to me, feels like something precious crystallised. Fragmentary because I am really proud of the writing, the coded references and little one liners, the catalogue of us, the delivery and the humour in mixing kinda mumble vocals with these kinda nonsense lyrics. I felt like I was having my Young Thug moment. I think that was one of the last songs we recorded, and it feels like a step in the right direction for me.
Nueen: Pixel Petals and Slammd - Interlude.
I also read that this album came together in three short months. As a musician, I can barely finish one song in that time period, so I cannot fathom doing fifteen tracks in ninety days. What enabled you to complete this album so quickly? Do you think your collaboration contributed to the haste of this project?
Iceboy Violet: Yeah, I mean, not having to make the beats helped loads. I normally take two-ish weeks to make a song from scratch, so Nueen just giving me this raw material to work with was really helpful. The immediacy and energy you get after heartbreak was also helpful. I had a lot to write about, and I could just keep going. I don’t think I’ll ever make anything as quickly as I did with this.
Nueen: Yeah, I was going through something really good personally, so I was really motivated to make music (otherwise I wouldn't even be able to open the computer). That, and the connection we started to build, encouraged me to keep making new music. Also, because I think that if I want to make an album or an EP or whatever with 7, 8 or 12 tracks, I have to do double or triple, you know? I like to produce impulsively, generate a lot of material and then polish the songs that I think have strength and consistency.
For Ice, was it difficult to be so vulnerable with someone in such a short period of time? What was the biggest challenge in this process, and what did you learn about examining the complexities of long-term relationships?
Iceboy Violet: Me and Nueen talked a little about what was actually going on while making it but mostly we talked through the music. I learnt, from other breakup music that I was listening to at the time, that the process for me and the end result for the listener was gonna be really tedious, toxic and limited if I didn’t also write about all the light in the relationship, the good parts, the love. It helped me get over it, write a better album I think, and not have to dwell in negativity for three months. The album didn’t have to justify the relationship. It wasn’t like I’ve just wasted three years of my life let's get something positive out of it. It was more honest: this was one of the most important, loving relationships I’ve ever had and I want to document some of it.
Your album was released early in June, right before your performance at Sónar Barcelona. Can you speak to the experience of performing together? What were some of the highlights from this day?
Iceboy Violet: It was odd because like, that was completely the first time we’ve tried that so there was a teething thing. It felt really emotional for me but also so different to what I’m used to. I was just trying to not fuck it up, but I’m looking forward to polishing it and finding space to play and improvise within it. I cried during soundcheck when Fawning came on. That was my highlight.
Nueen: It was very interesting even though we hadn't practiced before the show. The first practice was at the soundcheck (laughs). Plus I was playing at home, all my friends were there, so it was very exciting. I was so calm. I knew it would be fine. There were several powerful moments, but my favourite was with Closer, without a doubt.
As performers, how do you both choose to get a crowd amped up? Is enhancing the energy of your audience something that you both think about beforehand, or would you rather the process unfold more naturally?
Iceboy Violet: I think it’s different with this album because this album is more about bringing people in and getting them to invest their attention into me. Normally, I just try really hard, jump about and scream, lead by example type of thing, I’ll tell the audience, I’ll give you everything of me if you each give me a little bit of you.
Now, can you describe the meaning behind the title of your album, You Said You’d Hold My Hand Through The Fire? What does it mean to hold someone's hand through the fire?
Iceboy Violet: We were trying polyamory, it ended up being the sort of heaviest straw. I told my partner when discussing it that I was gonna be walking through the fire of my own insecurities and anxieties and they responded “I want to hold your hand through that fire” and yeah. It was one of the most romantic, loving things I’d ever been told. It was funny that it was said right at the end, you know? I didn’t want it to be a stick to beat my ex with, more just like when you break up with someone, you often mourn the future you thought you’d have, a lifetime of walking through the fire hand in hand, a kind of wounded animal cry too. To me, it’s just that, the world is on fire, and it’s a lot easier to keep going with the right people holding your hand.
For both of you, what was the most meaningful part of creating this album, on a personal level and from a collaborative stand point?
Iceboy Violet: Creatively, I wrote so much and I think I really levelled up lyrically. I have a long way to go still, but in terms of developing style, tying images together into cohesive verses and some of the delivery experimentation, I’m proud of it. Personally, working with someone else this intensely which I’ve never done before and just capturing my feelings three months after, how I feel has changed so much and you can never say anything but I think I said enough for now.
Nueen: I think it helped me to adapt to another person and another instrument like the voice. I had never worked in this way before, so it was quite a challenge on a technical level and in terms of creative direction.
How do each of you think your experience of collaborating on this album has shaped each of your individual relationships with making music?
Iceboy Violet: I think it just made me a lot more confident in my writing, made me want to write more, faster, to just kind of get things out and not feel like I need to be as precious with concepts. That being said, I’m only just starting to work on my next project, so we’ll see how it feeds in.
Nueen: It has helped me to think holistically and artistically. I have never put so much time and energy into a project and all its aspects (production, mixing, design, show etc.). It has forced me to be involved in all phases in order to achieve a powerful and attractive end result. So, it's been like a master's degree in the music industry (laughs).
How did this process help you grow in your music capabilities?
Iceboy Violet: It was fully a bootcamp type of thing. Writing that much, that intensely, for that long will definitely improve your writing. That’s mostly what I contributed and mostly what I gained.
Do you two plan on performing the songs in your album at any other concerts in the near future? What can fans expect from you both next, both as a unit and individually?
Iceboy Violet: We will hopefully be playing as much as possible in the next six or so months. We’ve talked about this, but there’s a definite shelf life on these shows. I don’t want to be doing performances about a past relationship forever and ever. As soon as I feel like I’m not getting any emotional resonance out of it, when it just becomes going through the motions, I need to move on. Together, we’ll see. I think we’ll always have space for each other because of how easy it is to work together, but for now I want to explore new things, performance art and a new solo record, mostly.
Nueen: Yes, we will be doing quite a lot of playing hopefully until the end of the year. After that, time will tell. I guess everyone will continue to develop their own projects. As for me, I have an album coming really soon, and I’m working on various art related projects.